So I decided to test her limits. I left my dirty clothes lying around in the room. She picked them up. No response. Never mind, try something else. I deliberately talked back at anything and everything she said. She merely reasoned with me softly. Hmmm. Never mind, up the ante. I tickled her. Hard slap to the back of my head.

6am.

Like clockwork, the persistent cry-like mumble would begin, waking me up without fail.

Everyday was an exercise in self-control, to refrain from asking the noisemaker to shut up. Trust me, it wasn’t easy.

See, this irritating sound comes from my mum’s daily prayers, what she always reminds me is; firstly, for my grandparents whom I love (emotional blackmail), secondly, for me (so I’m supposed to be grateful), and thirdly for the good of the world (cue for me to be touched and shed a tear). According to her theory, since she was doing such a noble act, I had no right to be irritated with her. And by not being irritated with her and thus not showing her a black face, I would make life easier for her and in effect doing a good deed.

And since she put things that way. I thought then that I could be a magnanimous gentleman and put up with her. So I did, till today.

That was probably the first thing I did for Tzu Chi.

But my fate with Tzu Chi stopped there. Though my mum remained active in the organization, and has since been made commissioner, I felt no need and want to know more about the organization. In fact there were many occasions that I felt unhappy with her for putting in too much time into helping others. My idea was that we should help ourselves first before we help others. Alright, I was just grumpy that she wasn’t cooking as much.

Then it all changed one day. Call it a quarterlife crisis. Sometime last October; I was constantly thinking about life in general. I felt that my life was a little empty. I had a job, and can gradually fulfill my material needs and even wants at times. But what’s next?

There was this spiritual emptiness. The question I kept asking myself was, if I were to pass away at this very moment, would I have led a good and meaningful life. The answer then was no. Well, unless you count breaking all records on my PSP games. But, erm, I think not.

This is when my mum comes into the picture once again.

Last November, she was due for commissioning in Taiwan. She asked for my blessing for her to take this further step on her Bodhisattva Path. Since all I want is for my mum to be happy in life, I told her to just go ahead if that was what she wanted to do. And she went and came back a different person.

I mean she has always been gradually been changing for the better since she joined Tzu Chi, but this time round, the change was much more noticeable. She came back all good tempered and all, speaking softly and all. Scary.

So I decided to test her limits. I left my dirty clothes lying around in the room. She picked them up. No response. Never mind, try something else. I deliberately talked back at anything and everything she said. She merely reasoned with me softly. Hmmm. Never mind, up the ante. I tickled her. Hard slap to the back of my head. Ok, Maybe that was a bad idea. And what she did to me after that would tarnish her reputation, so I am not allowed to share it here, haha.

But jokes aside, I really see this enormous change in my mum, especially when she first wore her ‘Eight Right Virtues’ dress. I thought she looked really good in it. It lent an aura of goodness and decorum to my otherwise, ahem, normal mum. Haha.

Anyway, that was also one of the days she was going to SILRA (Singapore Leprosy Relief Association) Home for volunteer work and it piqued my curiosity. I have heard her talk about SILRA Home on many occasions, but I didn’t really know what the whole thing was about. She then explained to me what she does there and all. Basically it was just going to visit the old folks’ there, talk to them and make them feel better for 3 hours every month. Hmmm, I can do that I thought.

And since, I have not looked back. I am now a regular volunteer at SILRA Home and have since joined other Tzu Chi activities and have recently gotten my grey uniform. Receiving my grey uniform to me is an important event as it allows me now to do home visits, which is something I am interested in doing.

I am very lucky to have my mum guide me along in the Tzu Chi way, but this of course won’t be possible if I weren’t willing to open my heart to Tzu Chi in the first place. Maybe it’s because of my mum, but I grew to love Tzu Chi after I see how polite and cultured everyone was in Tzu Chi. It was unlike other religious groups that I was involved in the past. I guess this may be Fate, but whatever I saw in Tzu Chi touched me and I will lay my life henceforth to follow the footsteps of our Master Cheng Yen.

I may not be able to found another great organization like Tzu Chi, but I will try my best to carry on Master Cheng Yen’s task of “For Buddhism, for Mankind.”